Brie Gowen

Savor the Essence of Life

How Would Jesus Respond to Black Lives Matter?

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There are so many aspects of society and its response to racism and inequality that I could talk about, but there’s really only one small part of this very large issue that I wish to discuss today. And that’s the thing. In essence this is a really small part. It’s a small act of service that we can provide to our brothers and sisters in the midst of a very large issue. In fact, this tiny concession means a big deal to the people in the muck of this mess, and who wouldn’t want to sacrifice (if I can even use such a lofty word) something so minuscule to make a huge impact on the feelings of another?

I think one of the bigger things bothering me during this uprising following the heinous murder of George Floyd (aside from blatant ignorance and racism, of course) is the position of some Christian brothers and sisters. Their perhaps well-meaning proclamations are hitting the ground flat, and they don’t represent me, although I am not one who is worthy to judge. You see, I too used to feel much the same as pious phrases I see pop up on social media, but I am grateful that the longer I live, the more the Lord reveals things to me. So, I thought I’d share what He’s saying.

As Christians (white Christians, that is), it’s easy to say things like, “Jesus died for us all!” And while I agree that’s true, we can’t stop there at such a deep-seated issue. After all, Jesus died to conquer sin, something that sadly still abounds and must be confronted. Remember when Jesus got angry and confronted sin in His Dad’s house?

We as white Christians will say that love is colorblind, and that the Lord only looks on the inside of a man. Again, these things are true, but the problem is that man doesn’t just look at the inside. In fact, they mostly look at the outside. They can’t help themselves. It’s that sin nature. Although we should desire to see people like Jesus, the problem is, we do not. We can’t change an entire society in a day. So, Karen, while I agree we should judge mankind by the red blood we all bleed, there’s too many bad people not doing that. We need to face up to that first.

And here’s the one I hate the most. Do you know I even said it before myself? I thought it was the Christian thing to say; what Jesus Himself would say. But now I realize I was just saying what I wanted to believe. What mattered to me. I was being selfish. I joined the band of good people saying “All Lives Matter,” but I never considered how far off base I was. Although all lives do matter to Jesus, in the face of inequality and racial injustice, I really don’t believe that’s what Jesus would say. I know, I know. I’m freaking you Caucasian, Southern Baptists out right now, but if we could ask Jesus how He felt about the Black Lives Matter movement, I really don’t think He’d respond like a large number of His followers.

Jesus would not say “all lives matter.”

When I was praying about this earlier and asking the Lord to reveal to me His heart on the matter I kept thinking about the verses in the Bible where Jesus washed the disciples’ feet. I started to Google “what the Bible says about equality ” or something to that nature, but my mind just kept telling me the feet washing was all I needed to know.

I felt like Jesus said to my heart, “when you say Black Lives Matter, you’re washing feet.”

Y’all, stay with me. In John 13:1-17 we read the account of Jesus washing the feet of His disciples. First off, you need to understand something about feet back then. They were dirty. Everyone wore saddles, walked in the desert, and probably in animal excrement too. Every house had a basin at the door so people coming in could wash their nasty feet before entering. Even the poor homes had a basin for guests. The richer homes, though, had a servant who actually would wash the feet of the guests. Can you imagine having that job?!

When Jesus washed the feet of His disciples He was taking a posture of humility. He was saying that even though His Dad was The King and it was His House, that He would lower Himself to the role of a servant, washing away our dirt, and making us more suitable to come into His home.

Posture of Humility. I want you to think about that.

John 13: 12-15 When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. “Do you understand what I have done for you?” he asked them. ““You call me ‘Teacher and ‘Lord,’ and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.

Do your remember the greatest commandment? It was to love the Lord your God, and second to love your neighbor as yourself. Our black neighbors have not felt very loved, and rightly so. They have felt less than us. Do you remember who Jesus revealed Himself as Savior to first? A Samaritan woman, who historically was considered less than a Jewish man, not only because of gender, but also race. Yet Jesus chose her for a very special event in history; to be the first to know the Son of God had come to earth to save mankind.

Jesus came to save us all, but He also understood what it was like to be marginalized. He revealed Himself to a Samaritan Woman to prove that He stood with the weak, the ones who were judged unfairly, the people who felt wounded by society. He loves us all, and He came to save us all, but He chose to reveal Himself to a woman who had been treated unfairly based on things other than her soul. He also took on the role of a servant to show mankind that humility is the best way to love!

Posture of Humility.

When people are hurting, Jesus takes a posture of humility. When people are treated unfairly, He takes a posture of humility. Yes, He throws tables too, but the beginning of having a servant heart comes with humbling yourself. It comes with saying, “I will be less, so you can be more.”

To answer back to Black Lives Matter with All Lives Matter, while basically true, is really the opposite of what Jesus would do. Check your heart and ask why the phrase bothers you so much. Is it because it implies white lives don’t matter to people? Or that police lives don’t matter? Or that your life doesn’t matter?

1 John 3:16 By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.

No one is asking you to lay down your physical life, even though Jesus did, but if you truly want to follow His example, you would see that a huge part of being a Christian is laying down yourself. We must constantly lay down our own desires and look at the desires of others. We must constantly check our own selfish ambition and motives. We must take the role of servant and see to the hurting people around us, forgetting our own pain, and only seeing that of others. When Jesus washed the disciples feet He knew Judas would betray Him, that Peter would deny Him, and that Thomas would doubt Him, yet He washed their feet anyway. He took a posture of humility that said, “it’s ok that I’m giving my life. This isn’t about me right now. It’s about you. Let me wash your feet.”

Do you see now? If you see someone hurting, cry with them. If you see someone angry, listen to their words. Hug them. No one is asking you to hang on a cross simply by answering, “yes, your life does matter. I’m sorry people have treated you like it didn’t.”

I would encourage you to lay down your pride and take the position of Jesus. Take a position of humility. The position of a servant who sees the injustice towards others and offers to wash their feet.

Some of Us Are Mary, Some of Us Are Martha, and That’s OK

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The Bible tells us of two sisters, Mary and Martha. Mary we have met before. She’s the sister who got into trouble, made bad choices, and had faced the consequences of them. Her reputation had suffered, and she was judged by others for her lifestyle choices. By all except one. Jesus. When she encountered Jesus her life changed. She saw that she was precious despite her mistakes. She learned redemption, forgiveness, and the meaning of love. Perhaps you know a Mary. Perhaps the Mary is you.

Although these sisters had their differences, one way they favored was their love of Jesus. I mean, to know Him was to love Him. After meeting Jesus and being enlightened to His truth, you were never the same. Mary was definitely never the same!!! But neither was Martha.

A popular retelling of the Bible, concerning Mary and Martha, shares an evening they spent with Him as a guest in their home. Consider it a party, and the guest of honor was Jesus Himself! This Bible story is especially popular in Women Group circles. I mean, no one wants to be a Martha!

In fact, you feel terrible guilt for being a Martha. There Jesus is in the very presence of these two sisters. He’s going to die soon! And He’s even told them all His time is near. Yet only one sister sits at His feet to glean from His charming conversation. The other is too busy baking bread or something. Come on?! Didn’t she know how sluggish carbs make you feel?

Ok, joking. Kinda. But seriously? Every woman has heard how she needs to not busy herself with menial tasks like Martha, but instead sit still at the feet of Jesus. The problem is that we women are really excellent at all the tasks. Like, we are task masters. We are multitaskers. We are killing this multitask thing! Oh dear! I’m guilty of being a Martha! Pack your bags. We’re going on a guilt trip!

Here’s the thing, though. I was recently reading a book that opened my eyes to something I had never thought of before. And as I thought about it more and more I realized something. Jesus was incredibly fond of Martha!

We only think of Mary. And yes, Mary was blessed by her stillness. She was blessed to sit at the feet of Jesus. He loved her deeply! And when He tells Martha that what Mary is doing is important, to lay off her already, we figure Jesus must be saying that being a Mary is where’s it at. We imagine Jesus being angry when He said this, but I imagine He gave a gentle smirk in her direction as He spoke. Consider this.

Martha adored Jesus. Just as much as Mary! But the Father creates us all differently. We go through different things in our lives, and the world shapes us in different ways. Mary showed her love by sitting at His feet. But Martha showed hers by serving.

To serve Jesus was how Martha said, “I love you!” It was her way of showing adoration. She probably swept that dirty floor ten times over before Jesus arrived. I can just see her turning a vase of flowers so the light of the sunset would hit them just right as it came through the window. I can imagine her tasting the food again and again, desiring it to be perfect for her Savior and King. This was Martha’s way.

Now the problem with Martha was she thought to serve was everyone’s love language, that it was everyone’s way. She couldn’t understand why her sister wasn’t more willing to love Jesus by carrying trays like she did! Jesus let her know that Mary was giving Him honor in her own way. A wonderful way. But I realized this week that Martha’s way was no less, like I had assumed before.

Maybe you’re a Martha. Perhaps you serve in the church choir, tend the nursery, and are in the church pew each time the doors are open! You host Bible studies in your home, lead a ladies’ group, and get your name on the list first of casseroles to take to a grieving family. That is wonderful! You serve Jesus in love. Be proud of that. But don’t assume that the Mary who listens quietly to the sermon and never raises her hand to volunteer loves Him any less. She is being still at His feet. That is her way.

The Father created a wonderful thing in women. We are wonderful at tasks, and amazing at serving. We’re the hostess with the mostest. Some of us, anyway, and the Martha’s out there should never feel guilty for walking in the gift they have been given. The gift of a servant heart.

But just as important, the Mary’s out there shouldn’t feel like they are less among women when they don’t have the gift of leading, organizing events, or hosting in their home. Some of us are simply more comfortable resting at His feet. We allow our sisters to serve, and we appreciate them. Our gift is insight at His feet. It’s a gift we give back to anyone who takes the time to speak to us about our first love. Jesus.

Are you a Mary? Maybe you’re a Martha. Perhaps you’re a mix of both. That sounds good! Whichever gifting emerges to the forefront in your life, the important thing to remember is this. Jesus loved both sisters! Although different, they were both precious in His sight!

Be a Helper

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He had not gotten nearly as much done as I thought he should. I had just gotten back from waiting for lab work. So much waiting. I had sat in that waiting room forever, holding my breath for them to call my name. There were always tests that needed to be run to ensure a traveling nurse was healthy for an upcoming job, but this last minute, surprise one was simply a hindrance on my timetable. We needed to be packed up, ready to go, check-lists checked, and to-do’s done. So you can imagine my frustration when I returned from the thirty minute trek into town and saw so many things still left undone.

I sat in the camp host’s office, settling our bill, and efficiently checking out so we could simply hook up and pull away the following morning. In my mind I tabulated the tasks I must complete.

“Is your husband over there?”

The man who ran our RV Park interrupted my thoughts with his urgent questioning.

“He is,” I commented with a smile.

I signed my receipt and carried on a conversation with the man’s wife.

“Dick sure is gonna miss Ben,” she said forlorn. “Ben’s his go-to guy!”

I smiled and replied, “Ben enjoys picking his brain too.”

At that moment the male duo appeared in the doorway.

“We’ll be back shortly,” Dick exclaimed!

I knew “shortly” was a relative term for this particular handyman. My husband eyed me eagerly, his countenance saying, “I’m sorry, babe. I gotta.”

I knew this.

I smiled. A genuine smile.

“Y’all go on!” I said.

My eyes spoke to my husband, “I know.”

Later that evening, after our work was done, we discussed it.

“I had to help him,” my husband commented.

I answered easily, “oh, I know. I knew you would, and I didn’t think anything about it. It went without saying that you’d go. That’s what you do.”

He was a helper.

My husband could start up a Bible study in our RV Park, I suppose, and perhaps some folks might even attend, but that wasn’t really how he did things. He was a helper. He was a talker. But more than that he was a doer. When we had first met the couple who managed our park my husband had told the man, “if you ever need anything, just let me know!”

He had followed his offer with a firm handshake and a solid gaze, but more than that, he had followed it with commitment. Every time Dick needed a helper, well, Ben helped. He was that way to everyone. He struck up conversations with all our neighbors, drew the old hermit out of his shell. He made the sourpuss smile, carried the groceries for the older lady, or helped the young, single woman turn a wrench.

The folks around here knew we were Christians; that certainly wasn’t a secret. If they didn’t catch it in the shirts we wore, the Bible my husband toted everywhere, or the praise and worship music emanating from our RV, then they picked it up from our young children who were always eager to talk about God’s love. The point is, they know we proclaim ourselves to be “Christians,” but they also see what our actions proclaim. They say, “hey, those folks are always smiling, always happy, and always eager to help a fella out when he needs it.”

We were helpers.

In a fast-paced world it’s easy to just keep on driving. You go past the broke-down car on the side of the road, you look away from the beggar, you convince yourself the addict will just use the money for drugs rather than a pillow to lay their head. The world says, “I ain’t got time for that!” But then again, I think Jesus told us not to conform to this old world.

It’s easy to be busy, run about, and get what’s ours. We gotta put on our own oxygen mask first, I guess you could say. But sadly, after it’s on, we pretty much forget the other guy. We think we can teach a Sunday School class or go on that week-long mission trip in the Summer to save some souls for Jesus. That’ll do it! We’ll give our 10%! Check the box. Done. Yet Jesus calls us for more. He calls us to be a servant, to be a helper, to be great lovers of His people. All His people. It’s not that hard. We can actually do it everyday. Everyday people are looking for a hand, and it’s up to us to lend it. It’s up to us to be the hands and feet, to show the world His love in our willingness to give our time and attention.

Jesus doesn’t call us to fly across the world and feed the starving children. He does some. But He also calls us to feed the children right in our own neighborhood. We feed them with the turn of a screwdriver, or the holding open of a heavy screen door. We feed them with a smile, a compliment, a helping hand. We feed them when we notice a need, and fill it. We feed more than stomachs. We feed hearts. We feed needs. We feed spirits. We feed the fulfillment of God’s will. We feed selflessness. We are helpers. And that’s something the world needs more of.

Why It’s Okay for Women to Be Servants

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Recently I was running around last minute finishing laundry, tidying my home, and throwing together a home cooked meal. I had to work the next day and the few hours left of time away from my nursing job were drawing to a close, but as I put tiny little shorts away in little white drawers I realized something unexpected. I loved it. I loved what I was doing. And I did it because of love. 

I see a world more and more frequently where women are made to feel odd for wanting to stay at home. They’re encouraged to seek first their career goals, and to share the load of the home with the rest of their family. And that’s fine. It totally is. I can stand behind that, especially in economic times that often require dual working parents. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with a woman who works outside the home; I work outside the home. But what bothers me is a society that says that’s the only way it should be, that anything else is demeaning to women. 

See, our advancing times are all about pushing “progress” which often leaves traditional ways of thinking in the mud. Feminist movements tell women “you deserve to be outside the home” and convince them that a desire to raise children solely is beneath them. In fact, this way of thinking convinces women that if they don’t work then they are less. 

The stigma of stay-at-home wives and moms is likened with laziness, and some schools of thought pile pity on a lady who wishes to care for her home as a career. It doesn’t seem lofty enough, ambitious enough, or worthy enough for a strong, intelligent woman. And the idea of serving your family? Well, that’s just absurd. 

Thoughts of servanthood bring to mind things like waitressing, being a maid, or even a slave, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. The fact is the word servant isn’t a bad word, it’s actually an admirable quality. If you look at a definition for servant it’s termed as a devoted, helpful follower or supporter. So therefore being a servant doesn’t equal forced behavior. It’s actually a labor of love. 

I am a servant in my home, and I am proud to hold that title. I serve my children because I love them, and I am modeling for them that when you love someone you help them. I’m a servant to my husband because I love him. I’m his biggest supporter, and I help him in any way I can. I tell him how much I love him, but my actions of servanthood show him in tangible ways. And you know what? He in turn serves me. Because he loves me. 

And I guess what I’m trying to say is there’s nothing wrong with that. There’s nothing wrong with serving those you love. It isn’t weak. It’s actually strong. For when you can give of yourself expecting nothing in return it shows you have a heart for others. Servants are leaders in their home. They are mentors for future generations, and if that’s not a high, respected calling in life then I don’t know what is. 
Let’s get rid of the stigma of women being servants. It’s not beneath them; it’s actually something we should all strive for in life. From a Christian perspective God became man in the form of Jesus so that He could serve mankind. What woman out their doesn’t wish to raise the bar a little higher when given such an honorable example to follow. The Savior of the world was a feet washer first, and perhaps it’s time we all got down on our knees for those we love. 

As I go about my day serving my family I try and remind myself why I do it. When time is short, my nerves are frazzled, and even when “thank you’s” seem to be lacking, I try to remind myself that I do it for love, and I really do love that. I don’t think there’s any higher calling for me as a woman than to serve those I love.