The other day I was scrolling through Facebook when I came across the cutest little picture of a friend’s baby. The kiddo was doing something adorable and it made me smile, but then I read the caption of the photo.
Please excuse my messy living room.
Yes, there were some cloths and things scattered about, but looking around my own living room disaster I decided hers looked pretty good in comparison. The thing is, I had done this before too. I had taken a great photo of one of my gorgeous daughters, but hesitated posting it because of the background chaos. I had taken a picture that was so freaking cute that I finally decided to share it anyway, but had been quick to add in my description, “don’t mind my pile of unfolded laundry.” But I guess my question is why? Why do we do this?
When will we as women stop worrying what other women think of us? When will we stop judging one another and instead support each other? When will we get real, be honest, and stop pretending we have it all together? How about admitting that in reality we’re all a big ole mess, and that’s cool?!
Because the fact is there is no perfect mom out there no matter how it appears. They’re just sharing less mess for others to see. There’s no woman with children who doesn’t experience a life with toys in the floor, piles of unfolded clothes, or a sink overflowing with dirty dishes. In fact, if you are a woman out there and you don’t experience these things I’d love to meet up. Actually, could you come over? I need some help unpacking a couple of boxes from back when we moved 11 months ago.
If you’re a mom, whether you work or stay at home, you will never experience everything in its place all the time. If you’re a mom of little children you probably never will. Messy and kids kinda goes together like peanut butter and jelly, and maybe we should stop pretending with one another like that’s a problem or something. It’s not something to apologize for. It’s normal!
Instead of saying, “excuse my messy house,” maybe we should be saying, “no, don’t excuse my mess!”
Don’t excuse my mess. Instead compliment it. We should be saying, “hey, good job on those toys scattered across the floor. It looks like you guys have enjoyed playing together today!”
I see your pile of unfolded laundry. That’s cool. I got one too. We sure do have a lot of healthy kids running around getting dirty, don’t we?!
I noticed all those crumbs on your kitchen floor. I know your family sure does appreciate the meals you fix!
Your kid isn’t wearing a cute outfit with a matching bow? I get it! I let mine dress herself today too. Some battles aren’t worth fighting, right?!
The thing is I don’t want a picture perfect representation of my life. I think it cheapens the reality of this blessed crazy business I call a family. We are toys on the floor! We’re dirty faces and messy hair. We’re walks to the pond rather than laundry put away, and we’re cartoons on the couch instead of an empty dishwasher.
So what I’m trying to say is no, don’t excuse my mess. Ignore not minding my dirty clothes on the floor. Embrace our mess because that’s who we are. That’s who I am, and if less than perfect housekeeping means a happy, healthy family then I’m all in. I’m celebrating my beautiful chaos. I’m eagerly sharing my blessed mess. I’m saluting fellow moms who are drowning in dirty laundry and searching for clean cups. I feel ya, girl. Me too.
Let’s stop apologizing for being awesome. See, that’s the thing. If you’re with me transversing through this crazy thing called mom life then you don’t need to say sorry for a single thing. You just need to be clapping yourself on the back for raising tiny human beings. It’s no easy task, you know.
So share those cute photos of your baby being adorable, and don’t give a single thought to what I’ll think about the mess. After all, behind closed doors we all have one.
Lisa Pierce says
What a great blog. All moms of little ones should read this. I only have one daughter and when she was little, I thought everything had to be ship-shape. I wish I had read an article like this wayback then.
I love your blogs and follow you via email.
Kudos to you and your toy cluttered floor!
brieann.rn@gmail.com says
Thank you so much!