The other day I was having a really down in the dumps kinda day. I couldn’t put my finger on it, the root cause I mean, but for whatever reason I just felt discouraged. The weird thing was that stuff I shouldn’t even feel discouraged about, I did. It was like a sliver of defeat ran right below the surface of my psyche, which was out of character for me, and in essence I felt like quiting on some of the harder things I had going on in my life at the time.
I prayed about the way I was feeling because that’s just how I do things, but the melancholy mood persisted like a bad odor that lingers after taking the trash out. Then suddenly, and quite unexpectedly, an encouraging occurrence happened along, and like an honest to goodness answer to prayer it elevated the mood I’d been trying to uplift all day. I felt excitement rather than drab, and I was reminded what a roller coaster human emotion can be. Especially as a woman.
In my happiness I reached out to share my good news and change of circumstance with my spouse, but from the first line I read of his text message response I could tell he was almost instructing me rather than celebrating with me. He was always like that!
Indeed, in a time where I expected to hear congrats he was instead delivering direction, and I wasn’t really surprised. He was always like that. He didn’t let me off easy, he didn’t placate my emotions, and he was always brutally honest. So instead of taking the easy route and saying “that’s nice dear,” he cautioned me. He warned me about putting all my trust in one thing or another, and about letting my emotions overtake me. He told me things might not work out like I planned, but that they would work out. He said,
I feel sometimes like you try soooo hard, and that’s a good thing, but you end up getting overwhelmed. God doesn’t want you to be overwhelmed. He loves you. I love you.
He was always like that. He was always worried about me, worried that I took things too hard, and worried that I let them overly affect me. Yeah, he had me pegged for sure. Because he truly loved me he wanted what the Lord wanted for me too. Peace. Not happiness that depends on circumstance, but deep down, everlasting peace. Then I smiled when I read the next part.
God is peace like a bird singing during a beautiful sunrise, or like a relaxing morning with a great cup of coffee. ?
That did sound good.
He was always like that!
Because he loved me he didn’t want me overwhelmed. Because he loved me he worried about me. Because he loved me he always spoke the truth to me. I don’t suppose I would want it any other way.
When you enter into a helpmate, intimate covenant with your partner for life you agree on things like for better or worse, and when the worst happens you approach it with honesty, wisdom, and unconditional love. You have to always be like that. And you have to wear eyes of love that see when your spouse speaks something other than what you expect, that they’re simply speaking out of real affection and unconditional caring.