This morning before I left for work I took the time to lay down beside my sleeping toddler. A slight smile graced her lips, and her perfect, tiny nose begged to be kissed. As I looked on lovingly at her sleeping face my heart felt that brief ache that mommies feel. It was the feeling of utter fulfillment. I knew at that moment I was blessed, and if I believed in such a thing as luck, I would probably pick that instance to proclaim that I’m the luckiest woman in the world.
As my belly has begun to blossom with the growth of my next child I’ve seen eyes more drawn to me. We’re typically noticed when we travel outside, and I smile at the stares from strangers over the antics of my little family. It’s hard not to observe a buggy bustling with a talkative four year old and a laughing toddler, and I typically revel in the obvious attention of onlookers adoring my precious cargo. But lately their eyes have wandered from my full shopping cart to my bulbous abdomen, and a look of pity is often present.
Many people are quick to comment when we pass them by in public, and I often times hear similar phrases.
“Bless your heart.”
“Oh, you must be so tired and uncomfortable.”
“You’ve got your hands full! And in this heat!”
I won’t even go into some of the rude, or perhaps poorly thought-out comments. Some people just seem quite astonished that I have planned so many little ones, like it’s a foreign concept.
“Wow! They’ll be like little stair-steps!”
Sympathetic smiles from strangers are pretty prevalent in my day, and although I’m grateful for their concern and compassion I also want to make a few things known:
I’m okay. Really I am. I’m pregnant, and I have a toddler and preschooler at home with me full-time, but I’m fine with that. In fact, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
No, it wasn’t an accident.
Yes, I planned to have them this close together.
Yep, my hands are full, and they’ll only get fuller, but I’m cool with that. My heart is also overflowing, and I love it!
I am sore, and I am tired. Very tired. But I’m also the happiest I have ever been in my whole life!
My husband and I want all these babies, and we can pay for them too.
It is a chore getting my young children out shopping, but I adore having them with me everywhere I go. I purposely don’t get a sitter.
I truly appreciate your sympathy, but it’s not necessary. Don’t feel sorry for me; I’m not.
Seriously. You don’t have to feel sorry for me. I’m not sorry. I’m grateful.
My vehicle is full, and so is my shopping cart. My house is crowded, bathroom too. But my life is so abundant of blessings and love that I can’t imagine feeling sorry for myself, so neither should you.
I’m busy, but I’m blessed.
I’m tired, but content.
I’m stressed sometimes, but always satisfied.
And as I gazed at the faces of both my beautiful girls this morning, as I rubbed my hand lightly, thankfully across my swelling belly, I knew I wasn’t feeling sorry. Quite the opposite, in fact.
Thank you for your concern and compassion. Truly! But when you see me, full belly, full shopping basket, and full heart, feel free to smile in a celebratory rather than sympathetic fashion, and remember I’m always delighted to hear the words, “Congrats. You must be so happy.”
Patty Grondin says
I always wanted to be a nurse and never made it,so I became an assistant,then a unit secretary for many years. I felt it was my job to lessen their load as much as possible. I loved my job and loved my nurses and hold them all to the highest degree. God bless nurses
brieann.rn@gmail.com says
Thank you.
Shelly Burke says
What a beautiful post! I’m so glad that you are enjoying the days and years with your kids~the time flies by and I’m glad I cherished every moment too. God bless you and your family!
brieann.rn@gmail.com says
Thank you.
Ashley Nickerson says
I know this all too well. The looks, the staring and the (what I consider rude) but better put poorly thought out comments… YES I know what causes it, YES I WANTED all my children and YES my hands are full. But exactly; this mother (and father) of three children (ages 3 and under) are blessed and lucky not cursed and crazy! Three children is not a huge family. Yes I can pay for them all and no I don’t need your pitty!!! Image what will occur when my fourth pregnancy decides to grace me with its presence (if I am ever so blessed)!
brieann.rn@gmail.com says
Exactly. ?