Yesterday I went shopping at Walmart, and I found myself applicable to enjoy the convenience of the express lane as I only had a few items I had to obtain. As I pulled up to the line I was mildly surprised to see it extended past the rotisserie chicken display, and I craned my neck to ascertain why. My answer came quick enough in the presence of the shopper at the head of the line, and I watched as this woman piled more and more things off her cart onto the counter. She had to have like at least forty or fifty items, yet she looked around innocently, never making eye contact, trying to pretend that she belonged there.
As I watched her blatant disregard for a sign that read twenty or less I realized that there are two kinds of people in this world. There are the kind of people that look in their buggy and resign themselves to the long line of the regular checkout, because it’s the right thing to do, and then there are the ones who choose to ignore the rules that have been put into place for the greater good of all. These people feel entitled to a lesser wait time, certain that their schedule is much more important than anyone else’s, and they will load their overflowing basket of groceries onto a stationary counter that’s not even made to handle that kind of haul.
Perhaps it sounds like I’m taking this express lane thing way too far, but after years of watching selfish shoppers buck the system I get a little frustrated. And after years of nursing it’s sad for me to admit, but I see the same sort of thing in the way of visitors for my patients. Not all, mind you, but some seem to have their own set of rules.
After more than a decade at the bedside I could almost pinpoint which visitors obey the twenty or less rule, and which ones simply decide to disregard the order of the system. And I’m not trying to point fingers here, but there seems to be a growing number of people entering my ICU doors who feel entitled to step outside the guidelines that have been put in place for everyone to follow. Perhaps we’ve made it worse over time by placating their every whim for the sake of good customer service, and while it’s true that the customer is always right, that doesn’t mean it’s always the right way to proceed. Or the best way.
The thing is that these rules exist for a reason, and just because you can’t see how they apply to you doesn’t mean that you can ignore them. They’re not there because we got bored and felt like making some stuff up, and they don’t exist so we can be mean or feel empowered. They don’t even exist so that we can go about our business undisturbed. Just like the rule of twenty or less exists to keep the express lane moving swiftly and efficiently, so too do Critical Care visiting hours and guidelines remain in place to ensure the fluid-like care of patients under our charge.
And while each visitor is a unique, special person in the grand scheme of life, for the purposes of entering the ICU visitor feelings are not our utmost concern. We do care about all of our patients’ families and their needs, but for all intensive purposes the individual patient’s best interests are our main concern. We do understand that family and visitors are an important part of psychological and emotional healing, but due to our experience in the physiological aspects also of patient care we understand that limitations are in order. To enforce a fair abidance of such limitations an overall set of guidelines are put into place. Then we expect and appreciate compliance to those rules put out there for the overall good of the patient. Doesn’t sound too hard, right?
This is a longtime system that should be pretty well understood by now, but the problem exists for those who do not think the rules in life should apply to them. These particular personalities are aware that rules exist, but they do not feel like those same rules pertain specifically to them. And while this way of thinking makes the individual feel better, in the end it’s not the best thing for everyone involved. In fact, in the end this is detrimental to patient care.
The thing is that we love visitors, and I make certain to tell all of mine, “thank you for visiting.” And I mean it. I know that their presence helps me make my patient better. But the fact remains that the healthcare system has developed ways to make it run more efficiently and more effectively towards the healing of its patients. These rules and guidelines exist for optimal patient care, and for them to work we need everyone’s participation. Everyone.
So when a visitor wants to bend visiting hours or restrictions for their own personal well-being, a better question would be “is my desire what suits the patient best?” Or I’d love for some to ask themselves “am I waking a patient who is finally resting for their ultimate good, or simply so I can feel better to see their reaction that I came by?” And if ever the answers to these questions are difficult to determine just remember that the nursing staff is always willing to guide visitors during such a difficult transition.
Quiet times exist for the purpose of a restful environment, and you cannot truly be offended when you are asked to leave the bedside for repeatedly being too loud. Drama is for soap opera and reality TV; it has no place in a patient care setting. Rules exist for dietary restrictions for good patient outcome, and home meds, once verified, need to stay at home, not be offered to the patient secretively. Visitor age restrictions are in place for the protection of emotionally fragile children and immune-comprised patients alike. (Do you really want your baby in a germ-filled hospital if they don’t have to be?) Visiting may be curtailed if the patient status isn’t accepting of excess stimuli. (Please understand this isn’t to be mean.) Safety standards are there to keep people alive, not to be an annoyance.
But I think the bottom line is this. Let’s just agree to do what’s best for the optimum patient outcome. When it comes to Intensive Care, or even hospital guidelines in general, years of experience and trial and error have proven what type of environment is conducive for patient healing. Whether twenty or less, or rather two visitors at a time, the point is to be respectful and compliant with what the posted signs read. After all, they’re there for a reason.
Rhonda says
Some units have hours that aren’t enforced due to making patients families mad and causing a complaint on surveys. Therefore some people won’t enforce the hours that are clearly handed to families first day. Just saying
brieann.rn@gmail.com says
You speak the truth.
Teresa Julian says
Well said. I have had to inform family members that too many can equal a safety issue/fire hazard and that they are more than welcome to wait in the waiting room and take turns. More than once, I have had my patients ask me “why do people feel it necessary to see me when I am sick instead of at home?”