I remember when I was a kid I used to love to read this book my mom kept in the kitchen. It was a cheese and wine guide. For those of you unaware, I am named after the French cheese, Brie. Yep, my mom named me after an appetizer she had at a party when she was pregnant. It was the 70’s you know, but I think it worked out. Anyway, I loved this book because it had a chapter dedicated to my namesake. I suppose it made me feel famous or something.
Once when I grabbed for the book I didn’t just flip straight to chapter three on Brie with Merlot, I read the introduction. It had a story about the origination of cheese. The story spun a tale of a man riding across the desert on his camel. He had brought along goat’s milk in his canteen instead of water, and when he stopped to quench his thirst he was surprised to find the liquid in his canteen had solidified. In the heat and steady churning movement the milk had congealed into a strongly fragrant mass. Braver than I would be this man stuck his finger inside a took a taste. Delicious! And cheese was born!
Yes, there’s certainly a few more steps to the process of making a tasty cheese, but I was impressed none the less. I was enamored by this story of something seemingly disastrous being made into something so wonderful. After all, aside from being my name, cheese was my favorite snack.
I was reminded of this old book introduction while I prayed this morning. I found myself experiencing something kind of surprising; joy in disappointment. It made me feel so happy to be excited about something not working out that I was inspired to try and always respond that way.
I recently found a house for sale that I absolutely loved. We’re just fine in our current home, crowded, but definitely content in our forced closeness. But I won’t lie and say that I don’t have my eyes open for a dream home opportunity. I’m not actively looking to increase my monthly house payment, but if a house with more square footage fell into my lap I would smile with appreciation, say “thank you Jesus,” and ask where I needed to sign.
It just so happens I thought I had found just that. A dreamy home with four bedrooms in my budget. My dreams at night were filled with images of bigger closets and double sinks in the master bath. I couldn’t help it. I got excited! But I also prayed about it in the midst of my mental back handsprings. I prayed for God’s will.
God’s will. Sigh. It used to be something that I honestly hated to pray for, just as bad as praying “God, help me be a better _____,” because there’s always that tendency to fear what God may have to do to cultivate change in you. It’s no secret, refiner’s fire is painful, you know?
When you start praying for God’s will to be done then you better be prepared for things to not always work out like you envisioned. It’s not always easy to give up control over how something is going to work, or not work for that matter. It ends up coming down to trust because you know that He knows. You end up deciding to go with the guy who wrote the play book because you want to win the game. I suppose that sounds like a silly, simplified version of God’s will, but in essence when you deny dependence on The Lord it’s as ridiculous as betting on a team that you know is going to lose because they don’t have a plan. Deciding to follow God’s will is finally admitting He has all the answers, and the only way to live a victorious life is to get on His team and let Him call all the plays.
Next step, you finally pray for God’s will, but then you encounter disappointment. You don’t get the job promotion. Or in my example, the house is under contract to someone else. Or sometimes, bad things happen.
Following God’s will isn’t a magic spell or a genie in a bottle. All your dreams are not suddenly going to come true with the wave of a fairy wand. Following God’s will doesn’t equal immediate blessings. It’s more of a long term commitment to let Him guide your life.
Blessings will come. But they may not always come when you think or how you think they should. They may just come through disappointment.
As you cultivate your relationship with Christ you deepen your trust and dependence on Him. This means realizing that God’s will is perfect. If things don’t work out, then it’s for a reason. If what you desire doesn’t happen, it’s still all good. God must have something better in mind, you see?
It’s like my daughter asking me this morning, “Why did God put me in your belly Mommy? Why are you my Mommy, and I’m your girl?”
Deep question for a three year old when you think about it. I explained, “God knew I would be the perfect Mommy for you, and you would be the perfect daughter for me.”
There’s no accidents with God. He knew her when He formed her, and He gave her to me. He gave her at the exact right time, no sooner, no later. Perfection.
We don’t see the perfection when it’s happening though, before it occurs. We don’t see behind the scenes. We can’t see the delays, missteps, or disappointments setting the stage for something perfectly beautiful. We only see to the end of our own noses.
When you can remind yourself, ingrain in your thought processes that every moment in your life, even the disappointing moments are with purpose, the purpose of furthering and blessing your life as you follow God, you will count it all as joy, and be blessed.
Deuteronomy 28:1-5 ESV
“And if you faithfully obey the voice of the Lord your God, being careful to do all his commandments that I command you today, the Lord your God will set you high above all the nations of the earth. And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you, if you obey the voice of the Lord your God. Blessed shall you be in the city, and blessed shall you be in the field. Blessed shall be the fruit of your womb and the fruit of your ground and the fruit of your cattle, the increase of your herds and the young of your flock. Blessed shall be your basket and your kneading bowl.
You will trust God in all things, even in the ones you don’t enjoy, the hard times, the disappointing things, the prayers seemingly unanswered, the problematic circumstances. You’ll remember that lemons make lemonade and that cheese was created from clabbered milk.
Now here’s the important part though. If you buy the pasteurized milk from the grocery store, it doesn’t truly clabber. It just sours into a putrid waste. Original, raw cow’s milk that clabbers can be used for tons of purposes, such as baking, and yes, even wonderfully delicious cheese. The stuff at the stores isn’t raw anymore. It’s not natural. It’s been altered by chemicals and all kinds of other things. And so it is with your life. If you alter your life with worldly sins God has a hard time working with it and making it into something wonderful. So if you want Him to be able to make blessings from even the disappointments, you have to remain pure, or as pure as we can be as humans working our best to follow the commandments of Christ. A pure heart, full of confession and desiring of forgiveness is a lovely thing that God can perform miracles with.
So when disappointment comes, count it as joy. Don’t throw out the clabbered milk. Instead make cheese.
Tish says
You are so gifted! Your talent to write so intelligently with the ability to share Gods heart is so comforting. May God continue to bless you! And me too for reading your blog and responding with my heart…
brieann.rn@gmail.com says
Thank you so much for the encouragement! I really appreciate it. God bless you.