Have you ever met someone who has a really hard time dealing with their problems? I know that I have. They’re the type of people who treat issues like building blocks, and instead of resolving a particular problem they allow it to stack upon itself. No situation is ever really dealt with, so instead of just trying to handle one thing they end up feeling overwhelmed by the looming hugeness of successive horrible circumstances that must be faced. Eventually it all comes tumbling down crushing the person in the aftermath.
Sometimes people do deal with their problems. They deal with them by covering them over with a false sense of resolution. In the past I chose to drink my problems away, and always found a welcoming numbness that could be induced by an alcohol haze. Sure the problem returned in the morning, along with a lingering headache, but for a brief time I might feel soothed. Or I would end up a weepy, drunk mess, chain smoking in my garage.
Even now I have a tendency to foul it up. When something goes wrong I might be the first to jump into a fix-it mode. I immediately begin racking my brain for what I can do to resolve a problem. The issue with this lies in how many circumstances arise that are utterly and completely outside of my control.
When conflict arises I may reach for my phone eager to spurt my anger, frustration, or grief into a listening ear. When a close family member doesn’t answer I might even resort to spilling my hurt feelings across my Facebook newsfeed.
They say you can never resolve conflict until you face it, and that your problems will never go away until you deal with them. And while I agree that we shouldn’t stack our problems upon one another, just letting our grief add up, or that we can’t cover them with our addiction of choice, I also feel like we are naive to think we can deal with it.
Proverbs 3:5
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.
We cannot face all of life’s issues on our own, and though we may try, the truth is that eventually it proves to be too much for our narrow shoulders to bear. We become crushed under the weight of grief, guilt, pain, disappointment, or even condemnation that comes from the enemy. We are force-fed that we must be strong to survive this world, but the hard truth is that we are weak. Eventually everyone breaks.
You cannot deal with your problems. But you can surrender your life to Jesus. You can hand your problems over to God admitting your own inability to control all of life’s circumstances on your strength alone. You can pray to Him in humble admittance of your inability to solve it all yourself.
It’s easy to let issues pile upon one another, and it’s more comfortable to cover them up. It’s human nature to fix our issues independently, or even to seek consolation from our fellow man. But broken hearts can only truly be healed by the Holy Spirit, and circumstances that are spinning out of control can only be stayed by the mighty hand of The Lord.
Forget what the world has taught you. You can’t deal with your problems, and you shouldn’t try. At least not on your own. And while God loves an eager heart willing to come to a resolution of conflict or ready to begin healing from past pain, what He desires most is our surrender to His sovereign hand. Allow Him to have your problems as that’s the only way you can really deal with them at all.
meltedflowers aka amy garren says
We r so alike. I used to drink like. Fish …..I could not deal with so much…now ..I’m no better ……I just don’t deal…not with grief..not any of it. I can’t…it’s too much. I sweep under the rug, eat some food….sleep. but I am learning…God help me
He is the only one who can.
brieann.rn@gmail.com says
That is correct Amy. He’s got this.