If you were to take a poll of what’s important for fathers to emulate to their children you’d have quite a few answers. Up at the top would be things like hard worker or good provider, great attributes that my own dad certainly gave. Many would tote honesty and integrity, both of which are definitely characteristics to be modeled and held in high esteem. Heck, I’ve even written about the importance of husbands treating their wives with dignity, respect, and love since their children will base their accepted norms on their parent’s behavior. And while I think that’s a huge responsibility of utmost importance, I expect even more of my husband in regards to training his daughters up correctly. I mean, loving me is easy for him. Treating me well isn’t a stretch. Certainly not as hard as loving the rest of mankind. No, I think my girls aren’t just watching how dad treats mom. They’re watching everything.
“Daddy is kind,” my eight year old spoke softly across the table to me.
“Yes, he is,” I responded with a smile.
I looked over at my husband laughing, smiling, and having a full conversation with a stranger. The man’s eyes crinkled at the corners and radiated a glee to match his smile as he conversed with my spouse. His atrophied hands gestured animatedly as he spoke. His head turned to the side to watch my husband dispose of his lunch trash as he sat still in his weathered, electric wheelchair, pulled up to a lone table in the eatery of our local shopping mall.
I had noticed him sitting there all alone at a table near us, eating Chinese noodles as best he could with the plastic utensils provided. He didn’t have a drink to wash the salty meal down, and I watched as my husband offered him the new bottle of water he had just bought for himself. I watched as he held the bottle up to this stranger’s lips and slowly tilted it up so he could drink. I watched as he dug through the fella’s backpack, per the man’s request, retrieving a pack of gum. I watched as my spouse helped clear his table, and I watched as he held a conversation with him. But I wasn’t the only one watching.
My eight year old spoke again. “Daddy says you should be kind to everyone because you never know when your actions might just make their day. I’ll bet Daddy made his day!”
I smiled.
“Yes, perhaps he did,” I mused.
A little later my husband said his goodbyes, the stranger in the wheelchair drove away, and my spouse took his seat beside me.
“Do you know who was watching you?” I asked, nodding towards our eight year old.
He glanced at our eldest daughter.
“Good,” he said.
Then he started eating his own lunch.
It was easier for a man to love his children, even easy to love his wife. He could work hard for them, help a next door neighbor without a thought, or give his time without hesitation to the church. And these were wonderful, great things! But what of the strangers? What of the people that everyone else ignored? The ones that people diverted their eyes so as not to stare. The invisible strangers who needed a hand, but usually just got walked on by. What about the people we didn’t know, the ones we didn’t feel obligated to assist, the awkward, unknown people that walked in our periphery? The stranger on the side of the road, beaten by life, alone and silent. Did we often walk to the other side of the road, look away, push it from our mind, keep moving? Usually, yes. It was a bit harder to help someone outside our own circle, beyond our front porch, or different from us. Yet weren’t we called to shine light on all the world?
My girls were watching their father, and I was proud they were. He treated me like royalty and with love, but then again, he showed his love to everyone he encountered. That love opened his eyes to everyone he encountered, even the lone, disabled guy at an empty table that a hundred others had ignored. His love came out as kindness to his fellow man, and his children saw this as just normal behavior. They saw it as the way you were supposed to be. They saw his kind heart, the impact it made on others, and my hope is that they would model it, growing up to always be a helping hand to those in need, a loving friend to all, and a bright light in a too often dark world.
They were watching him, and I was glad.
Holli says
Beautiful!!! I just read the book, “Ministry of Ordinary Places” by Shannon Martin. It’s a GREAT read that totally expresses what your husband did for the new friend he met at the mall!
brieann.rn@gmail.com says
Thank you.
I’ll have to check that book out!
Dave says
Our church in Florida has a sign over the doors as you exit that reads, “You Are Now Entering Your Mission Field”! There is a world full of hurt and rejection in this jungle we pass through each day! We still share our memories of a young woman who had some mental challenges who had started attending our church in Florida and she was brought every Sunday by a couple in the church! We started picking her up as she really wanted to help the wife & I as we got to church early to make coffee and put out things people could eat with their coffee! The wife couldn’t make it one Sunday due to a report her boss had her come in to do at work on that Sunday! After picking the young lady up she mentioned that she attended a church for awhile near her house! I asked her how she liked our church and she made the most profound statement that displayed how Jesus taught us how to treat and not to treat the least of us! She said our church made her feel needed and wanted but the other church never asked her what her name was or even acted like they wanted to be her friend! Your husband displayed such an important action of Jesus that will live on in your children’s minds! Making this man feel wanted and loved! I praise God for compassionate people and I know that not only touches the hearts of those receiving it and those who see it but most of all it resounds throughout the heavens when God smiles on it! I like it when God smiles cause I want to please Him and thank you for sharing this wonderful moment in time! We need that so much more!
brieann.rn@gmail.com says
Thank you so much. Imagining God smiling made me beam also!
Lisa Pierce says
Me too Dave!
Lisa Pierce says
I’m reminded of what Jesus said, “When you did it unto the least of these, you did it unto Me.”
What a great example of what Jesus would do. Thank you so much for sharing. My soul is filled to the utmost !! I needed this today!
brieann.rn@gmail.com says
Thank you!