- Today started out like it was going to be a day of tears. I feared we might drown in them all. First off Chloe was in a “breakdown about everything” mode. It started first thing as we were watching cartoons together. She was in my lap, quite comfy. The baby woke up and started crying. She was hungry. So I went to retrieve her. Chloe started bawling. I could kinda understand that one, jealousy and all. But it didn’t stop there. She cried because she couldn’t get her pajama pants back on after using the bathroom. She cried because she didn’t want cereal for breakfast. She cried because she didn’t want to take a bath. It was insane! It seemed like every minuscule thing was a cause for total meltdown. After my blog yesterday, this morning was a definite test of my abilities to have patience for my child and not a reaction that I would regret later.
- If you have a child or have been around babies, then you know that depending on their age, the cry will be different. There’s the newborn cry that is very distinctive. It sometimes resembles a screaming cat, but when they first arrive and you hear it for the first time; it is the best sound you’ll ever hear. Fast forward a couple of days when they’re doing that for an hour straight at 3 am, and it may not sound so sweet. Fast forward a couple of years and you have the toddler, whiny cry I heard all morning. An infant has a different cry as well, and often depending on her need, the cry will differ. You can often tell the difference between hunger, boredom, or exhaustion based on the quality of the crying. Today Bailey did such an upset cry, that it melted my heart. She had been laying in her crib watching her mobile. She began a fussy cry that told me she was bored with that and considering a nap. I was doing some other things, so I scooped her up and put her in the swing to lull her to sleep. Well, she didn’t like that at all! She let out a loud, pain-filled, shrieking cry. It even had the stuttering, out of breath quality that punctuates a cry when a child is truly and exceptionally upset. She didn’t want to lull herself. She wanted to be lulled. She needed the touch of another to help comfort her into a sound sleep. Once comforted, she fell asleep easily and soundly.
- The girls weren’t the only ones crying. I found myself this morning feeling the need to cry out to God. I told Him I needed to hear His voice. Sometimes we have questions and we can’t feel His presence as close as we may like. Or maybe we’re not getting the answers we so desperately seek. Or maybe the answer to a persistent prayer eludes us. Sometimes as a child of God, I feel like Chloe, wanting to bawl over everything when it doesn’t go my way. Or maybe sometimes I’m like little Bailey, crying out desperately for that comforting arm of God that I need to put me at peace so I may rest. So, I cried out to my Father today. I was reminded, Seek ye first the kingdom of God and all these things will be added unto you. Financial worries, job stresses, or questions about what God’s plan is for Ben and I with a ministry in mind; these can all be taken care of when I walk in faith and choose to seek God rather than my answer that I want right then. I’m reminding myself of this right now, as I often have to do. I have to remember that the answer may not be immediate because God is working in me. He’s working in Ben. He knows when we’ll be ready for His answer. And who can cry about that.
That is all 🙂