I am the proud mother of a two year old. I am the exhausted mother of a two year old.
She is so sweet. She is straight-up evil.
She is the most adorable little thing; I could just squeeze her. She is the most irritating little thing; I could just squeeze her.
She is my life. She will be the death of me.
I can’t stand when I’m away from her. Sometimes I want to run away.
She’s a joy. She’s a challenge.
Lately I have been blessed/cursed with a new phase for my adorable/psychotic toddler. She has become quite fluent in whine language. She cries at the drop of a hat, and not just when she wants something. She cries about everything. If stuff goes wrong, if it goes right. There’s no rhyme or reason to her behavior. It’s just what she’s doing for now. Please pray for me.
Here’s reasons that my toddler has cried. Just today.
- When she couldn’t flush the toilet.
- When I wouldn’t let her drink her big sister’s bottle of pink, Barbie mouthwash.
- When she couldn’t get her shoe on by herself.
- When I tried to help her get her shoe on.
- Because I picked out Frozen panties instead of Dora ones.
- Because her sucker wouldn’t break when she tried to bite it.
- Because I didn’t offer jelly beans for breakfast.
- When she saw a gnat or fly because she thought it was a bee.
- When I wouldn’t let her delete all the apps off my phone.
- When I accidentally sang the same song she was singing.
- Because I gave her a square slice of American cheese when she really wanted a stick of string cheese.
- Because I wouldn’t let her go outside to play in the dirt in her pajamas.
- Because ‘Enchanted Forrest’ Dora was on TV instead of the Puppies Galore episode.
- When her big sister got to shut the door; not her.
- When I suggested to her maybe not peeing in her pull-up today.
- Because I couldn’t stay outside with a fly swatter killing every bug in a 500 mile radius.
- When I put on Dr. Phil. I guess that’s understandable.
- When her sister dropped food on the floor.
- Because I wouldn’t let her pour the laundry detergent in the washer.
- Because I wouldn’t let her lick the inside of the dishwasher or drink from the puddles of water in its door.
- Because she broke my candle.
- Because the bubbles are all gone.
- Because she needed a nap.
- Because I made her take a nap.
- Because she woke up from her nap.
- When I wouldn’t let her put a toy the exact size of her windpipe in her mouth.
After another full day I’m overflowing. After another full day I’m overwhelmed.
I love her so much I can hardly stand it. I can hardly stand at the end of the day, but I still love her.
Parenthood is the hardest job I’ve ever loved. I love it even though it’s hard.
Every day is an adventure. Every adventure brings another day. Another day with these crazy, cute, cuddly monsters.
I’m up for the challenge. Or maybe it’s down for a nap.
*photo credit: Jill Greenberg